Marriage Can Get Better Every Year

This summer breathed even more new life into my 20 year marriage.

I took the summer off from writing articles, and focused it on reconnecting deeply with my family.  And the payoffs were HUGE.

The first 18 years of our marriage were held together by duct tape and shoestring.  I won’t go into it now, because my book will be out soon enough.

What I can tell you is that two years ago I learned some new ways to BE.  I learned some new things to DO.  And now I HAVE the marriage I always wanted.

You’ll find me writing a lot about BE-DO-HAVE.  Living this principle is the best way to create the life and relationships you wish to create.

Most of us live the opposite way:  HAVE-DO-BE.  We put all our energy into trying to HAVE what we want (the right car, job, salary, marriage, kids).  Because only then (only after having what we want) do we believe we can DO what we want (impress our friends, buy that house, take romantic getaways).  And doing those things will help us to BE what we want (happy, rich, loved, peaceful).

I’ll be illustrating (and you’ll be able to experience for yourself) how BEING who you want to BE is the number one way to heal your marriage (and your life) in my marriage workshops - launching Fall 2009.

For now, just ask yourself - especially if you’re in a relationship that isn’t exactly as you’d like it to be:  Who do I want to BE?  Or even, How do I want to be?

If you want to be happy, peaceful, loving, confident - what can YOU do today that will take you one step closer to that?  Not what can HE do.  What can YOU do?

What would it mean for you, today, to BE “Love?”  To BE “Peace?”  To BE “Joy?”  To BE “Confidence?”  What would that look like?  What would you do?

This is the first step toward making your life, and your marriage, better and better every year.

What’s the second step?  Stay tuned.

Share any insights in the comments section below.

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